Saturday, January 31, 2009

Smarter than the Average Bear?

In yesterday's New York Post, there was an article by Peter Brookes, who is a Heritage senior fellow and ex-deputy assistant secretary of defense. The article, "Help Mexico Beat the Narco-Gangs" was featured on the POSTOPINION page.

Here's the first paragraph:

Mexico may be headed to hell in a handbasket as a result of grizzly fighting between the federal government and drug cartels -- and among the narco-gangs themselves.

The piece takes up half a page, but Brookes tells us nothing about the bears. I want to know more about them. When did they become involved? How difficult was it to train them as combatants? Were they able to adapt to the drastic climate change? Mexico is a very hot place.

To me, this bear-fighting business was by far the most noteworthy and newsworthy thing he had to say. I wonder why Brookes never followed up on it.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

Splendor in Grass (Tanka)

Confucius say when

man cannot keep up with her,

smart woman lie down

and give him chance to catch up.

Then they have Hallmark Moment.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Who's Minding the Store?

Celebrate Kay Yow's uplifting life

By Yael T. Abouhalkah, Kansas City Star Editorial Page columnist

Ravaged by breast cancer, Kay Yow died Saturday. It's a sad day for basketball fans across the nation.

But the coach of the North Carolina State women's team had waged a two-decade fight against the disease worth celebrating.


I wouldn't call cancer "the disease worth celebrating". But then, I don't write editorials for a major newspaper.

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Turning a Minus into a Big Plus

T-Mobile decides to hang up on Barkley (from Yahoo! Buzz)

Dwyane Wade no longer needs to keep his cell phone on vibrate. Charles Barkley won't be calling any time soon.

T-Mobile disconnected Barkley's "Fave 5" commercials with a statement saying that "given the recent developments" Sir Charles' spots no longer will air.

Barkley was charged with DUI in Arizona after a Dec. 31 arrest and is alleged to have had a blood-alcohol level nearly twice the legal limit. Also, according to the police report
, Barkley shared a little too much personal information, saying he was on the way to a 1:30 a.m. tryst with a woman he had just picked up.

If T-Mobile had a 900-number campaign working, maybe Barkley would still have a job. As it is, a company spokesman said of Barkley's future that, "As he works through his personal matters, we will evaluate where to go from here."


Now that Barkley has lost his broadcasting and endorsement gigs, it's time for a career change. I'm sure the porn industry would welcome him with open arms -- and other body parts.

No need for Sir Charles to repent or rehabilitate himself. He'd make less money, but he'd get to do what he loves.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Thanks, But No Thanks

Just got an promotional email from Bally's: "Discover the New You in Just 8 Weeks!". What I want is the old me, circa 1955.

Friday, January 02, 2009

Rachin' Around the Hanukkah Bush (based on his Symphony#2)

No use pretending that I wrote this song
There's really nothing more to say ......

Why write a tune when you can rip somebody off
A dead composer like Rachmaninoff
When Eric Carmen did it, he got sued
He ended up a rich and famous dude

Have a Happy, Happy, Hanukkah
Have a Happy, Happy, Hanukkah
Have a Happy, Happy, Hanukkah
A Happy Hanukkah

Have a Happy, Happy, Hanukkah
Have a Happy, Happy, Hanukkah
Have a Happy, Happy, Hanukkah
A Happy Hanukkah