Tuesday, February 28, 2006

The Facts Of Life (from MySpace)

Current mood: Dr. Ruthian

Category: Romance and Relationships

My young friend Pun sent me a bulletin which listed fifteen "mistakes" girls (sic) make when having sex.

I took exception to many of his complaints, but # 6 was so ridiculous, I had to comment. I hope young women don't buy into this adolescent male fantasy and "mew" in bed, the better to please their inexperienced partners - and by inexperienced, I mean inexperienced at giving and receiving sexual pleasure.

Giving and receiving pleasure is not the same thing as fucking.

Put that at the top of your list of "mistakes", Pun, and you'll be performing a public service.


Date: Feb 24, 2006 2:35 PM

15 mistakes girls do on sex time! true story!!

6. MOANING LIKE A RUNNER THAT NEEDS AIR - Better moan with style girls cause men love to make fun of girls who can't moan like movie stars. Try not to make much noise when you exhale.


You've been watching too much porn, Pun. You need to get out more. Movie stars moan like movie stars because they are faking it.

Real women having real sex make scary faces and and weird noises. The bigger the orgasm, the more contorted a woman's expression and the less "sexy" her vocalizing.

Satisfying a woman is a man's job*. Sometimes, it's a dirty job --- and that's the fun part.

When the sex is good, it looks and sounds like someone is getting hurt. Badly. If you want something that mews and purrs, get a kitten. Leave the pussy for a man who knows the difference between acting and the real thing.

* or a woman's .... but clueless boys need not apply.